


Please, let me Live in Solitude

by SubutaiKhan



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Heavy Angst, NDRV3 Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-26
Updated: 2018-07-26
Packaged: 2019-06-16 18:34:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,668
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15443268
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SubutaiKhan/pseuds/SubutaiKhan
Summary: You know who survived at the end of V3, don't you.Okay. Let's see what could happen if something doesn't go as planned.





	Please, let me Live in Solitude

_Himiko Yumeno_  
  
I slowly roll out of the rubble, pushing debris upon debris to open a way.  
I feel like my body is a big walking bruise. A rolling bruise, to be more precise.  
But I’m alive.  
And I shouldn’t be.  
Saihara convinced Harukawa and me to use our lives to end Dangan Ronpa. We agreed. We three were ready to face our end, courtesy of Kiibo’s arm lasers or whatever the heck he used to destroy the academy.  
I get upright. Careful Himiko, you’re in a quite bad shape.  
Something went wrong. Or should I say _right_? At the very least something went not according to our plan of action, since I’m alive.  
Does this mean that they too…?  
I scan my surroundings.  
And what I see…  
A bloody hand comes out from under a giant rock, mere centimetres from where I stand. The sleeve is blue.  
Oh.  
Maybe she…  
No. I find her a couple of meters away. Dead. Buried under a mountain of boulders.  
I extract her body, after a long struggle, and drag it I don’t ever know where.  
After six steps I stop.  
You’re a damned liar, Saihara.  
You said we should have used our lives as weapons against this cursed game. We should have died like martyrs, all three of us, to destroy it and break its vicious circle.  
You two did exactly that. You went and died on me.  
You left me all alone.  
How? How am I supposed to survive now?  
My eyes start to dampen up. And then they dart by themselves to the… ceiling?  
There’s a crack in it.  
Out there is a world which has changed its mind about this blasted reality show. And I have to face it all by myself.  
That’s unfair.  
For a moment I flirt with the idea to commit suicide, just to be consistent with what was said in the courtroom. And because I’m scared.  
But then I discard the prospect. I’m not sure why, but some part of my brain decides it wouldn’t be the same doing it afterwards. I lost my chance to be a hero.  
Why don’t I regret it like I’m supposed to?  
I’m… I’m…  
Confused.  
Angry.  
Sad.  
Aimless.  
My body drops me on my knees, next to Harukawa’s corpse.  
I cry. For me, for her, for him. For Angie, Tenko and all the others.  
One survivor out of sixteen. And the worst part is that I’m an error, an accident. I should be like my last two companions.  
To be honest, half of me is glad to be alive.  
The other is simply terrified of the consequences.  
After a handful of minutes, in which I lose myself in the tsunami of emotions, a semblance of calmness comes.  
Tenko was absolutely right, manifesting your feelings is therapeutic.  
I’m still a mess, and I won’t stop soon. But I’m slightly less messy than before.  
I put Maki’s hands in a cross over her chest and I close her eyes. She deserves that much, at least. I consider trying to free Shuichi from under the rubble, but it’s too difficult a task for me and my small hands. I’m still not at 100% physically, and I doubt I’d be able to even if I was.  
And now…  
I try to gather whatever splinter of courage I still have left in me.  
Time to go outside.  
Time to grow, Himiko. To prove to yourself that you can do it. Or to fail miserably while trying.

*

_Maki Harukawa_  
  
This is… unexpected.  
Right now I shouldn’t be breathing. The end of the trial saw me, Saihara and Yumeno rebel against Dangan Ronpa, in a desperate attempt to make its popularity plummet. And we did that by forfeiting our lives.  
We won. So, as logic suggests, we should be dead.  
Instead, against all odds, I’m still here. It’s not something worth complaining for. In fact I’m quite fine with the situation.  
I manage to climb out of the rocks that obstruct me. I see more than one scrape on my legs, and that’s why I’m not as agile as I’d like to be.  
“Saihara! Yumeno! Where are you?”.  
I surmised that, since I’m alive, they probably are too. I guess this is Kiibo’s doing. Maybe he tried to keep us from harm.  
But they don’t seem to be responding to my call.  
My mind comes immediately to the worst possible conclusion: somehow I’m the only one who survived.  
Thank you for having made me a pessimist, you prick of a game. I hate you now more than ever.  
But it’s not just pessimism, not this time.  
After a brief time I find them.  
They’re both dead.  
They got crushed by the falling walls of the school.  
As I watch their poor corpses, I’m still trying to rationalize what really happened here.  
Why? Why them and not me?  
What did I do to deserve this fortune? Or misfortune, the jury is still on the fence about that?  
We were supposed to die together.  
A blaze of glory. Three little people who challenged the big bad TV giant… and won. At the cost of their lives, okay, but it’s a victory nonetheless.  
They had it. I was denied.  
And while, as I said before, it’s not that bad being alive per se...  
It means I can still suffer.  
It should have been all or no one. All dead or all alive. Not this middle of the road nonsense.  
And then, all on its own, Kaito’s image appears in front of my eyes.  
Yeah, that’s what I meant when I said _I can still suffer_. Not that I’m delighted about their demise, because I’m not, but he…  
Even if it was something artificial, he was the first crush of my life. Or maybe not, but I can’t say that for certain.  
Being alive, right now, is not something I’m particularly fond of.  
Join them? Now?  
No. Why? Out of the three, I was probably the one less inclined to make such a grave decision. Saihara put my back on the wall when he almost coerced me to accept.  
And, with the deed done, I survived. I’m not eager to backpedal, you know.  
Besides, my will to stay as I am is too strong to be subdued a second time.  
Out of discussion. I’m not killing myself.  
I bet no one is envying me. Not too happy to be alive, not too happy to end my existence. It’s a bit stupid and I can see why.  
Oh well, here I am.  
Nothing I can do about that, except live.  
I feel obligated to go on in Saihara’s and Yumeno’s stead. Fate, luck or someone else decreed this, and I have to deal with it.  
Suicide is not an option. So just one alternative remains.  
I struggle to pick up both bodies. I’m not leaving them here, at the mercy of Team Dangan Ronpa. When I finally succeed, me and my two friends start our journey towards the outside world.

*

_Shuichi Saihara_  
  
No no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no.  
Wake me up from this nightmare.  
This… this is not happening. It’s not happening.  
I’m not the one who nearly forced Maki and Himiko to follow my suicidal plan… and survived.  
They aren’t dead.  
I refuse to acknowledge this. It’s not true.  
It can’t be.  
How is it possible? And why?  
Why I’m here, alive, while they lay motionless and lifeless on the ground in front of me? They got overwhelmed by the sheer quantity of debris collapsed on us after Kiibo’s spectacular display of robotness.  
I did too, getting overwhelmed by the debris I mean. But my personal kami, bastard that he is, found it funny to let me escape that destiny and be able to feel guilty forever for their deaths.  
I will never forgive myself for having made them follow my suite. Or, to phrase this better, I would have if I had got to share their eternal slumber.  
This is cruel irony at its highest peak.  
The one who initiated the Let’s Kill Ourselves deal is alive. His innocent adepts are not.  
I can visualize Tsumugi, from the otherworld, sneering and laughing at me.  
My left arm hurts. I think it’s broken. As you can imagine, I don’t really care about it right now.  
The scream I release figuratively pierces the dome above us.  
Maki… Himiko… I’m so sorry for outliving you. It’s not fair.  
I know myself. This burden will weigh on my shoulders for ever and ever. I won’t shake it away, not in a hundred years.  
And in the end I will commit suicide, squashed by grief and regret.  
So… why delay the inevitable?  
After all, it’s not this fake Shuichi Saihara who deserves to be the last survivor. It should have been Maki, perhaps. Or Kaito. Or, better yet, Akamatsu-san. It doesn't matter if all our personalities were forged, she still was the best of us and the most worthy of that role. Of course she was one of the first to die.  
I start searching Maki’s corpse for her knife. Sorry for manhandling you like this.  
And when I find it, the light’s reflection blinds me for a couple of seconds.  
Are you really sure, Shuichi? Plunging a blade into your heart is not something you do on a whim.  
…  
…  
…  
Yes, I’m sure.  
Nothing will ever fix me. Not even if these two poor unfortunate souls will, one day, come to me as ghosts and say to my face that they don’t blame me for what happened.  
I don’t want to wait God knows how many years before doing what I know I will do.  
Better to be swift.  
I grip the weapon with both hands and turn it toward me. It seems my arm wasn't broken.  
This is what you want.  
Don’t hesitate.  
It’s the right thing to do.  
Be strong. Be determined.  
For once in your life, dammit.  
SZOCK.

**Author's Note:**

> So, what do you think? Like it? Hate it? Find it meh? Tell me, I'm open to all kind of criticism.  
> Thank you in advance for all comments, kudos and whatever.


End file.
